Lyrics

You can’t believe the television!!!
It’s a fucking head game
They pile them fabrications sky high so you start to believe in nothing
Then - when the big lie comes along
It’ll be so unbelievable, you’ll think it’s true
Except - I’ve been around the block a few times
So I believe in nothing
I give nothing
And I hurt nothing

I was watching the diving on the telly
The water diving
With Olympians… jumping off the diving board
Hold on!!!
Zoom into Tom Daley’s thigh!!!
His skin Isn’t human
That Tom Daley
He’s a fucking dolphin
The authorities have rescued a sea mammal out of a tuna net
And popped it in speedos

They think we’re too thick to realise

Yeah that’s right
I said yeah
I can see it
I see the truth

He lives in a world where the bears don’t shit
And the Pope is never catholic
They never ever ever put a man on the Moon
And Frank Sinatra faked his croon
And Tom Daley is just a fish

Got a High School diploma in conspiracy
Knows his facts from fantasy
If the people in the news didn’t exist
He wouldn’t get his knickers in a big old twist
And Tom Daley’s just a fish

Why do they want to distract us with world-beating sporting performances from kidnapped dolphins?
It’s to take our minds off the secret elite
Lizard people rule the world
Always have
They were there causing trouble at the battle
of Astings, Battle of Agincourt,
All them battles beginning with A
And when we fight Alpha Centauri – lizards will be sending us to our deaths
Maybe you’re lizard people?
Well, you got to be photoshopped as you can’t look that gorgeous
I have a lizard detector – if you wiggle your tongues at this big old fly
I know you’re a lizard
Go on…
You a bit peckish?
There’s a little bit of movement in YOUR mouth
My investigation- is inconclusive
Still, I tell you what I do know
People in small boats are actors!
People in small boats are actors!
Actors
Actors
Actors
Fake news

Still, I can see the truth
And I speak the truth
Nothing evades me

He lives in a world where the bears don’t shit
And the Pope is never catholic
They never ever ever put a man on the Moon
And Frank Sinatra faked his croon
And Tom Daley is just a fish

He knows a thing about conspiracies
Muhammad Ali couldn’t float like a bee
He knows a thing about conspiracies
They never made a man more clear sighted than he
Doesn’t trust
Got his wish
Now young Tom Daley
Is a big old fish

I want to live where the lies don’t stick
I want to live where they don’t talk shit
I want to live where the lies don’t stick
I want to live where they don’t talk shit
I want to live where the lies don’t stick
I want to live where they don’t talk shit